Battling Shyness and Low Self-Esteem for a Better LifeShyness deprives a person so many wonderful things. Shyness deprives one the many opportunities and possibilities that a whole lifetime can offer. A shy child can miss out on the chance of playing a big role in a school play. A shy teenager can lose the opportunity of becoming a part of an active organization. An adult can miss the likelihood of getting a good job or a better position because of lack of assertiveness. What Causes Some People to Become Extremely Shy? There are variations of shyness among different people. Some only have the ‘occasional shyness,’ when they are in very uncomfortable situations. Some people on the other hand have extreme cases of shyness. This can completely hinder the growth and lifestyle of the person as the shyness defines the whole being of the person. There are many causes that will make a person shy. One major culprit is having a low self esteem. What Is Self-Esteem? Self-esteem characterizes the belief of the person in his or her own self. This includes the faith of the person in his or her own dignity, value and capabilities. The self-esteem of a person serves as an assurance that he or she can stand up and take action no matter what happens. People with high self-esteem can do many things. They view life very positively. They are confident. They are free. They enjoy life, even the difficulties and the challenges. They express what they feel. They stand up for what they believe in. This is what shy people often lack, the proper self-esteem. Shyness has become correlative with having a low self-esteem as most withdrawn people see interaction and active lifestyle as pointless. Some develop low self-esteem because they may have undergone some bad experiences in the past. They could have been treated badly by their loved ones or some nasty things may have been said in their skills or performance. They turned out feeling that other people will end up better than they do in whatever they do. They think that there is no point in asserting themselves as other people can take better control of things. This should not be the case. Every individual is unique from others. Every person has worth and something to offer to the rest of the world. Things a Person Can Do to Increase the Self-Esteem and Overcome Shyness 1. One can start expressing the self in other mediums. This is to reassure the self of the many capabilities and potentials that may be developed. This is also a good way to start discovering good things about the self. The activities could include writing, painting, drawing or photography. 2. Talk to a relative, a friend, a mentor or anybody you trust the most. Confide what is happening. Express what you feel. It could be that all that is needed is someone who understands. 3. Some people may require talking to a counselor or an expert, especially those who went through a more challenging past. Do not hesitate. They can very well help in resolving the conflicts or confusions. 4. Review aspects about the self that one is good at. Try doing these things more often. Praise and reward the self for every successful outcome. 5. Avoid doing so many things at the same time. This could lead to confusion and frustration if nothing gets accomplished. It is best not to give too much pressure on your self. Just keep things grounded. Stick to one thing you are good at. Eventually things will pick up and be happy for any good results. 6. Do things to make yourself happy. Do not worry yourself about pleasing other people. They are probably preoccupied with themselves anyway. So just focus on your own life. 7. Find a love one to hug. Hugging may be a very simple act, but this could very well give warmth to a dampened spirit.
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